An Important Message
by The Quote Bandit
Summary: The male cast gathers to tell their fans a VERY important message...I wonder what it is?


**I simply carry this message for the male cast of Yu-Gi-Oh characters. None of them have a account. And here's so you can read this and know who's saying what:**

Normal = Bakura

**Bold = Marik**

Underlined = Kaiba

_Italicized = Jounouchi_

_**Bold Italic = Yami Bakura**_

_**Bold Italic with these things //\\ = Yami Yuugi**_

_Italic Underlined = Yuugi_

**Hopefully, you can keep up =) NOW READ!**

* * *

Hello there! In case you didn't know, I am Bakura. And this is rest of the main male cast. We have a message for you.

**A very serious message.**

One of a matter of life and death.

_Ah, get on with it! We need to get this over with!_

You're right. It needs to be quick and painless for them.

I say make them suffer.

**I second that.**

Be quiet for a second! Okay, here's what's going on. All you fan girls seem to think the entire male cast is gay. Let us tell you something.

_We aren't freakin' gay! There ain't no WAY in hell I'm going to go make out with Kaiba! Elgh._

Thanks for the highly disturbing mental picture, moron.

_Like you haven't read worse in the fan fictions._

Touché.

**Plus, how is it even POSSIBLE to do that stuff with my…he's my OTHER PERSONALITY DAMNIT! That's like...That's like...I don't know, but it's WRONG even if it wasn't impossible.**

Plus, why on EARTH would I fall in love with the Thief King? He made my life HELL. I mean, yeah, okay, Stockholm Syndrome and all, but somehow I doubt half the writers even know what that is. And sure, couple symptoms here and there, that's cool, but that does NOT mean that I'd like to have gay sex with him or would even LET him do that even if it was possible. Which, back to Malik's point, it's NOT. And as LK said, I'm not gay, I'm just British.

_**I'm not British, I'm just gay . –laughs-**_

You really aren't helping the point, thief.

_**Hehe, it was far too good of an opening to pass up. I make no comment on whether or not I prefer men or women, or which I sleep with more-**_

_**//What happens in Egypt, stays in Egypt.\\**_

_**-but I can tell you that my host is fairly low on the "List of People to Fuck."**_

Jee, thanks.

_**Don't mention it.**_

But seriously, we don't, Jou and Kaiba don't, Jou and Honda don't, and…ehm….Malik doesn't either.

**We hold off all bets with Yuugi and his Yami though.**

_Hey, I'm not gay! I have a crush on Anzu, for Pete's sake._

_**//I say nothing.\\**_

_H-hey! At least PRETEND you aren' t gay!_

_**If you two didn't want to be labeled the Almost-Completely-And-Totally-Canon-Yaoi-Pairing, then you should've acted less attracted to each other.**_

_We do not!_

You guys did hold hands once for about two or three minutes.

_Plus Yami Yuugi spent at least four episodes moping about how he lost his "Aibou."_

_**// In my defense, that was my fault, and I felt horrible about the whole, you know, trapping his soul into a stone slate and all that. \\**_

**Notice he has no defense for the holding hands thing.**

_After spending awhile on your knees crying and shouting "AIBOU! AIBBOOOOUUU!"?_

_**// I never said I wasn't gay.\\**_

_Excuse me?!_

_**So what we have is only one pairing that is actually gay, and you can carry it, too! Yuugi and his Yami are both gay, so please, go all out with them. –laughs-**_

_I'm not gay!_

That might've been the cruelest thing you've ever done....

* * *

**Yeah...that said it all ^^ I actually wrote this like four days ago, but I thought it was stupid. Then I read another yaoi fic.**

**Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against you guys liking yaoi, it's just....**

**It gets annoying when almost all the stories with my favorite characters (Bakuras and Jou) are slash. I do NOT want to read one more gay butt sex scene.**

**EDIT- I don't actually think any of these characters are gay. Yami included. As Dan Green said, it's more of a father/son relationship then romantic relationship.**

**But as he also said, it's so much more fun to say they are x3**

**And Honda's not here because shut up 0:-)**

**(/end disgruntled rant)**

**Sorry for the weirdness of Yami's talk. FF kept on taking off the underlined part of it so it looked just like Yami Bakura. =\**


End file.
